Mantra #7: I Choose to Focus on the Good

A mantra to shift your thoughts from negative to positive

I grew up in a culture where women worried, and men gave them plenty to worry about.

My early view of the world was shaped by an environment of gloom and doom, but in my twenties, I stumbled upon Norman Vincent Peale’s book The Power of Positive Thinking. I didn’t know it then, but that book would become a turning point.

As I read it, I felt something inside me shift. For the first time, I realized I had a choice in how I saw the world, and myself in it. I didn’t have to inherit the gloom-and-doom mindset I’d grown up with. I could choose how I saw the world — and myself. That single shift revealed possibilities I had never imagined.

I wanted to share this new way of thinking with everyone I loved, but I quickly learned something important: people often become comfortable in their misery. Complaining feels easier than changing.

I learned that our thoughts act like magnets. They attract people who reinforce either a negative or positive worldview. I began drawing in people with the mindset I wanted to develop. Over time, focusing on the good became automatic.

Choosing to focus on the good doesn’t mean pretending life is perfect. It means refusing to let the hard moments define the whole story. It’s a proactive mindset—one that seeks solutions instead of spiraling into fear or frustration. It’s a choice you have to make over and over until it becomes your way of seeing your world.

This shift strengthens your mental health, deepens your relationships, and builds resilience. When challenges come, you’re better able to cope because you’re grounded in what’s still true, still working, still meaningful.

This mindset also influenced my leadership style. When I was a senior manager at a large consulting firm, I often had underperforming employees assigned to me. Within months, many of them became top performers. The main difference was focus.

We spent more time emphasizing and developing strengths wherever possible instead of weaknesses. As their confidence increased, so did their performance. It feels much better to excel with your strengths rather than be weighed down by weaknesses.

Reflect on your own career. Haven’t you been happier in roles where you could excel at what you do? When you focus on improving your weaknesses, you might only become average. But when you concentrate on developing your strengths, you can become exceptional.

The same is true in our personal relationships. Our children, surrounded by so much negativity, need to learn how to find the good. Our spouses need to feel appreciated for what they do right, not just what irritates us. In those moments when criticism comes more easily than praise, this mantra becomes a lifeline: I choose to focus on the good.

What you focus on becomes your reality. The world might sometimes be chaotic, unfair, or overwhelming, but you still have the power to choose your perspective. When you intentionally seek out the good — in yourself, in others, and in your life — you invite more of it in.

So next time your mind drifts to what’s bad, pause and ask yourself: What’s good here? What’s still working? What deserves my attention? You might be surprised by how much good is already present — waiting to be noticed.

Everyday Resilience: How to Rise from Life’s Setbacks

Life, at times, throws challenges our way that seem insurmountable. Moments of doubt, fear, or uncertainty can cast a shadow over our innate strength. But here’s a truth that often goes unnoticed: resilience isn’t something extraordinary, it’s something within us all. It’s not a trait reserved for a select few; it’s the quiet force that allows us to adapt, endure, and rise.

Resilience doesn’t always look heroic. It’s not always about grand gestures or dramatic triumphs. Sometimes, resilience is simply waking up in the morning and putting one foot in front of the other when it feels like the world is pressing down. It’s choosing to keep going, even when you’re not sure where the path leads.

Consider the trials you’ve faced in your own life. No matter how big or small, you’ve made it through challenges before—and that’s proof that you’re more resilient than you may believe. Think about the ways you coped: leaning on friends or family, finding moments of joy, or simply holding on and waiting for the storm to pass. These are all acts of resilience, and they demonstrate the depth of your inner strength.

What’s remarkable about resilience is that it grows with use. Like a muscle, the more we encounter adversity and push through, the stronger our capacity becomes. This doesn’t mean you have to welcome hardship—it means that every time you face life’s difficulties, you’re cultivating your ability to rise again.

Remember, resilience isn’t perfection—it’s persistence. It’s not about having all the answers or making no mistakes; it’s about continuing to seek solutions and having the courage to try again after setbacks. It’s about recognizing that setbacks are temporary and the possibility of a brighter future is always within reach.

So, when life gets tough, remind yourself: you’ve faced challenges before and survived them, and you can do it again. Even when the road ahead seems daunting, know this: you’re resilient. You’re stronger than you think. And your ability to adapt and endure is greater than you’ve ever imagined